Toilet humour – number 2!

games, kids, toilet training
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I know this is the one you’ve all been waiting for.  It’s often the one my boys have been waiting for… if you see what I mean! There’s no holds barred, so if you are even slightly prudish, then don’t read on. You will be offended!

My approach to this has always been an open door policy. By that I mean the boys will ask if I’m doing a poo and if they can see it. Now I know this sounds vile, but it helps them to understand that it’s perfectly natural and we all do it, particularly if they have a phobia about it. So then we have a couple of tricks to get the troublesome item out –

1. As recommended by Grandme, a good old rub of the knees to try and encourage it out.

2. As recommended by me, we listen to see if we can hear their bottom ‘creaking’ – the sound the poo makes as it’s making it’s entrance (I told you this is not for the faint hearted!)

3. Show them how much quicker it is to do the business on the toilet/potty rather than soiling themselves, therefore they have more time to play – a stopwatch works well with older children to indicate the difference.

4. If they manage to do something, have a look and try and describe it. I know this sounds weird, but it is quite amusing and helps to de-stigmatise it. Rabbit droppings, like raisins, logs, a snake – and magic (when it disappears round the u-bend as it’s so big!) are all things my boys have come up with.

But most of all, try not to let it get to you. Now I know this is much easier said than done. 5 pairs of soiled pants in one day is the record in our household – my colleagues even used to have a guess every day in an attempt to bring some humour to my seemingly never ending situation. It did come in the end, but I was at hair pulling out stage by then (that’s usually when it does all click for them). Oh, and don’t forget, you’ve always got bribery – find out what they would really like (not too expensive!) and work towards it – a sticker every poo or day without an accident, some small treat after a week, and work up to the big one. Anyone in business knows bribery and corruption rule!

Toilet humour – number 1

games, kids, toilet training
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There’s nothing us Brits like more than a spot of toilet humour. But there’s nothing us parents like less than being driven up the wall by the the frustrations of toilet training. It’s enough to make even the world’s funniest person lose their sense of humour. Anyone who has faced or is facing this situation will know exactly what I mean.

 So a couple of tricks to try and inject some humour back into toilet time – bearing in mind that I only have boys, some of these may be slightly less successful for girls!

Firstly, when it comes to wee time, trick number 1 is to put a cheerio or two in the bowl and see if they can hit them. They will flush away after a few goes, just make sure they don’t try to fish it out and eat it! Another one on a similar vein is to put some food colouring in the bowl and watch it change colour as they wee on it.  A different tactic is to get them to try and guess what colour their wee will be eg if they have been eating beans, we look to see if it’s orange…blackcurrant squash would be purple etc. etc. Naturally it should never be those colours! (but it is a good way to check how well hydrated they are, particularly in hot weather – the paler, the better).

Then you’ve also got wee a hole through the toilet paper, or if your son has an older brother, sword fights are very popular – try and hit the other persons wee – though we do have a very strict ‘in the toilet only’ policy and any misfires result in instant disqualification!

If you’re strong enough to stomach that, keep checking for the inevitable number two, which will be coming soon (ewwww…)